Be The Pigeon

OK, am I "that" old? Nope, not yet. Yet, I manage to fall down (hard) on nice flat (ok, it was stepped) concrete. Darn near broke my ankle. Guess that's just karma for laughing at Shane's leg last month! Last Saturday I was leaving a friend's house and walking down their front steps when I tripped on some air pretty hard. In my defense, it was jagged air. I fell down the stairs, rolled, and probably said some things I shouldn't have. Good thing Misha was there to watch it all. When I stood up, I saw stars like I haven't seen in years. I was certain I was gonna pass out. Good thing I didn't. That would have been really ugly material. So I picked up my pride (a sma ll portion remained yet) and got Misha into the car, and we headed home. Other friends who were also leaving and who saw the flamboyant flop, kept asking if I was OK, so I had to play tough. When I got home, it hurt. It hurt bad. I knew it wasn't broken, but it was my left

NOTE: Pictures are forthcoming for this post! I'll repost when I have them. People measure success by many different methods in life. For me, success is partially measured in surprising my wife at her birthday with something that she actually likes. You see, this is somewhat of a holy grail for me. My track record ain't that hot. I am not the most creative gift giver (I actually am in heavy competition with the least-creative people), and my abilities to plan 364 days ahead and strategically think of things many months before the actual date is, well, absent. Hats off to the women who do that so well. I am genetically predisposed to not do that. So Jolayne had " the " birthday last week. You know, " the " birthday that most folks dread. She took it really well, actually; a model of someone who isn't caught up in the pop-culture that says age is defining. Way to go. I've been thinking for months about what I could do to surprise her and mak

According to wikipedia, lurker is defined as the following: lurker is a person who reads discussions on a message board , newsgroup , chatroom , file sharing or other interactive system, but rarely participates. So, are you a lurker? I've noticed with blogging that the commenting process is--for many--some sort of personal validation. Validation that the post is actually available to real, breathing people on the real Internet (and not some scam by Google to trick us into sending our thoughts into the ether where they are only consumed by the Matrix who will someday take over our existence). Validation that those real, breathing people actually read, ponder, and even chuckle at what is written. I hear it over and over from my friends; apparently for (most) of us who blog, we are so unsure of our self worth that we can only be content with our web presence when other choose to provide witty feedback. So my questions are twofold: Why? Why do I need this validation? I have a f

I don't have anything witty to offer today, so here's another fun bunch of information, complements of my dad. Neologism Awards Washington Post Invitational (2006) Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly neologism contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words. The winners are: Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent. Negligent (adj.) describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp Gargoyle (n.), olive-flavored mouthwash. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline. Testicle (n.), a humorous questio

One of the fun things I've done with my kids over the last couple years has been to watch some of the classic movies from when I was young. Of course, we started with Star Wars, and my kids are junkies now. Then we moved on to Indiana Jones (but had to skip the 2nd one since it's a little intense). We also picked up ET along the way, and somehow it keeps coming to visit us from the library. Finally, we've just started into the Back to the Future trilogy. The thing that really gets me is how much swearing there is in that (PG) show! Back when I watched it as a kid, it surely didn't have that much swearing. I'm certain it's been redone to add more expletives than it originally had. That has to be the answer. Not like I want to admit that we just got immune to hearing all that. Anyway, the kids love it, and we find that we have to be a little more cautious about screening what (in our minds' eye) we originally thought would be great for them. Funny h

My dad sent me an audio clip explaining the history of the National Anthem today. Thought I'd post it here . A nice 5-minute listen while you're catching up on other stuff. Helps us to remember what a magnificent country we live in. Never take it for granted. If you haven't seen this stirring photo before, read the story about it . It was a 2006 Pullitzer Prize winner; pretty neat. There are other moving photos on that link as well. Though there is much wrong with this nation, and it seems often to only be getting worse, please consider taking a moment every so often to focus on the awesome history, the divine intervention we have received so many times, and the absolute grandeur of where we live.

Someone just mailed this one to me, but it's pretty good. This one was taken on my mission in the Philippines. We saw some pretty crazy stuff driving down those roads. Best lawyer ad I've ever seen.

If you live in the Denver area and have kids, you might enjoy the following 2008 bargains (they were shared to me): Denver Zoo , 2300 Steele St., Denver, 303-376-4800 Monday, January 14 Saturday, January 26 Thursday, January 31 Thursday, February 14 Tuesday, October 7 Saturday, October 18 Sunday, November 2 Sunday, November 9 Denver Art Museum, 100 West 14th Avenue Parkway, Denver, 720-865-5000 The art museum is free the first Saturday of every month: Saturday, January 5 Saturday, February 2 Saturday, March 1 Saturday, April 5 Saturday, May 3 Saturday, June 7 Saturday, July 5 Saturday, August 2 Saturday, September 6 Saturday, October 4 Saturday, November 1 Saturday, December 6 Denver Botanic Gardens, 1005 York St., Denver, 720-865-3500 Monday, Jan. 21 (Martin Luther King Day) Monday, February 18 (Presidents' Day) Monday, March 17 Tuesday, April 22 (Earth Day) Monday, July 21 Saturday, September 27 Saturday, October 18 Denver Botanic Gardens at Chatfield, 8500 Deer Creek Canyon Rd

Something my sister does on her blog (which I really enjoy reading because it's so "real") is to just post random pictures. They don't have anything to do with the posts, but are fun shots of her family or whatever. Think I'll adopt the same concept, only with a slight twist. I've come across some pretty funny pictures that I've kept over the years. Video clips too. I'll share them over time. First up, something my teammates at work sent me not long after I started. The funny thing is, it looks like my kid pictures, is the right era, and really could be me! Second, just something that makes me glad for the kids I have! Welcome to the blogging ranks, Jim!

I spent two years in the Philippines serving a mission for the LDS church. I grew to love that country. I stumbled upon a relatively amazing happening there recently. One of the prisons in the southern part of the country is trying something I've never seen before as part of its rehab program for inmates. They dance . They're pretty good, too. In fact, they have a whole collection of routines, all on YouTube. Here's my favorite. This is pretty funny stuff! There's alot of things wrong with government in that part of the world, but I'm pretty impressed with this. These men, many of which had no skills at all upon being sentenced, are now a part of something positive. They post new dances every few weeks, and from what I can gather on the latest posting, there's a whole political brouhaha going down now in Cebu because of the (in)correctness of what they're doing. Much more interesting to follow than who won in New Hampshire!

Tonight I visited our church cannery in Denver. Every time I go there I am amazed at the things our church does. The gospel is truly about the whole person: spiritual, physical, and emotional. It's unlikely that many folks would get a chance as part of their regular religious experience to make and can chicken-noodle soup, but that was my opportunity tonight. Of course, as with most things, I was not content to simply be serious about the whole thing. I had to have some fun. My friend Chris went with me, and it's always more fun when you're with a friend. And boy was I glad to have my two-sizes-too-small, flaming-orange Discover-card t-shirt tonight for an easy wardrobe selection. We started the night with safety lessons and instructions (not altogether unlike the safety drill before your plane takes off: if the 100-gallon vat of boiling broth behind you should happen to explode all over you, grab the yellow oxygen mask from above, breathe normally, lean over and pres

This is a fun widget I received (thanks Dad). Try it out. I made it to level 6 with an IQ of 93 before losing. This Traveler IQ challenge is brought to you by the Web's Original Travel Blog